solitude76 on Xanga

Weblog

Sunday, 19 April 2009

i think facebook killed xanga! with the minute-to-minute update, who needs to write a freakin journal? when i go back to my page on xanga, i could review how i feel at a particular day and time.

anyway, i haven't given up on xanga yet especially since i think that writing is quite important. constant text messaging has screwed up my grammar a bit as well, so it's good to look things up on online dictionary every now and then.

the departures

i saw an unexpectedly fantastic movie this past week with edwin. lawrence and kuan had talked so much about it so we decided to give it a try. although it won an oscar, i didn't know anything about it so i went without any expectation.

i was blown away by the beauty, precision, and compassion of the ceremony. who knew something beautiful could come out of death ritual? the idea that such ceremony could be so serene and therapeutic was touching and a bit disturbing at the same time.

on my research, i found out that it took 10 years to make the movie. the lead actor actually learned how to perform the ceremony and play the cello. it was definitely worth the effort!

the movie was a bit dramatic and over the top at times, but hey, this is an asian movie

joe hisaishi paired the movie with amazing music. i am on the hunt for the soundtrack.

bandung
i went back to bandung during easter with 7 of my friends to show them my hometown and to share more a bit about me. all 8 of us stayed at my parents' house. we all fit and got along well. no drama because they knew i would push any trouble makers into the volcanoes.

on our first day, i decided to stop by my old school where i attended kindergarten all the way through high school (junior year). the school was closed because of the holiday so we didn't get to see much, however we got to see the kindergarten. i couldn't believe how small that place was.

on my way out, i said hi to my old middle school PE teacher who retired 6 years ago. he remembered my face but didn't remember me. i didn't hate him when i was in school but i hated his class. i did whatever i could do in my power to skip his class by hiding, forging my parents' signature, pretending being sick, etc etc.

some of my closest friends know how miserable i was during my school years in indonesia. being able to visit the school peacefully without any trace of resentment or regret was more than i could ask for.

some random photos from iphone:

Sunday, 15 February 2009

i watched slumdog with jeanne today. what a lovely movie! we could not stop talking about it afterwards. to see india from a perspective other than bollywood dancing or yoga practice is very refreshing. the love story is over the top but nevertheless touching.

i told jeanne that i cry everytime i see a movie with her. i better not start making it habit!

slumdog is definitely a must see. aside from the story line, the soundtrack is fantastic.

in some way, this movie reminds me of a combination of city of god, monsoon wedding, and moulin rouge.

i didn't love the movie as much as i wanted to. maybe i was distracted by the many incoming text messages i received last night. the ideas of open relationships, indiscretion, friendship, and the "ideal" life are worth exploring. but in the end, i didn't come out feeling that i got anything out of the movie.

the soundtrack, however is amazing. it is filled with spanish guitar which always takes me to another realm. i have to go to barcelona and find my own painter (without a crazy ex, of course).

fmylife.co
this shit is my new favorite website. there is another site similar to this called grouphug.us.
here are some of my favorite entries:

Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML

Today, I got my license renewed and the woman behind the desk looked at me and said "guess we need to update the weight, huh?". FML

Today, I got really depressed and decided to call Kids Help Phone. An operator answered, and as I started to talk about my problem, I stuttered a couple times because I was nervous and upset. The operator hung up on me. FML

Today, my boyfriend's sister called me to wish me congratulations and ask me when I was due. I said I wasn't prenant to which she replied "Yes you are, my brother just told us the good news". Long pause. "Oh wait is this Mary or Morgan?" I'm Morgan. Who's Mary? FML

Today, my Mom came to pay me a short visit at college. She handed me some flowers, which were a Valentine's Day gift, because she "figured I wouldn't be getting any from anyone else this year." FML

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad proceeded to warn me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said "sorry I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML

Today, I went to dinner with my friend and his family. I went to the men's room at the same time as his father, and as we peed next to each other in adjacent urinals the father looked over at me and said "Don't worry, I've seen smaller." FML

Today, I got my boyfriend a pair of concert tickets for his birthday. He loved the gift, but turned to me and said "Do I have to bring you?" FML

Today, as I was getting dressed after having sex with a guy I like, he told me I looked better with my clothes on. FML

Today, when my boyfriend and I were lying in bed, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML

Today, I told my mom I was excited my boobs were getting bigger. She told me that that's what happens when you get fat. FML

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex girlfriend. FML

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her exiting her room....my electric tothbrush in her hand. FML

Today, I made a joke about having a wedding to my mom and she told me not to joke about something that will probably never happen. FML

Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML

Today, my on-and-off boyfriend of 8 years asked me to cheer him up. I told him that I'm in love with him. He said "Oh, I just wanted a blowjob." FML

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

Sunday, 08 February 2009

i couldn't find the right words to describe how i felt after watching the movie. i started crying when harvey called scott (franko) early in the morning after he watched the opera. the silence after the conversation - a very subtle touch - showed how they found peace in their struggle and love.

i think it is a must see movie for everyone. one can argue that it is a gay movie, but if gay context is substituted with women, minorities, or disabilities then fundamentally this movie is all about how we should fight for our rights.

next on my list to see: benjamin button, the reader, and slumdog.

Saturday, 10 January 2009

a word of wisdom from tom ford:

"There’s one indulgence every man should try in his lifetime: If you’re straight, sleep with a man at least once, and if you’re gay, don’t go through life without sleeping with a woman. Either way, you might be surprised at how natural it will feel if you can get past the mind-fuck of stereotypes. In the end, it’s just another person that you are relating to in a physical way."